As I've mentioned, Cambridge features in my novel. I always hold my breath when I read your posts, hoping I got the research enough correct. So far, so good. Thanks as always. Also bewitching photograph that is an excellent writing prompt.
Thank you Marjorie! Glad we both have done our research (always good to get tips too). What is your novel's title? I agree with you about the Victorian wedding photo as a good prompt!
You are much more informed than myself. I love reading your insights. The title is still in play; I have three and waffle constantly. Im still editing the novel (aka slashing.) I write long. Anyway, its an adult, literary fiction, family saga, with historical fiction elements. Four POVs, and one of those is the primary character, Howard. In the early 1980s, Howard is forced into an early retirement from his London law firm and embarks on a passion project. The result changes the his life and the lives of all the people most dear to him. Most of the story takes place in Norfolk around Dereham, an important chunk in Cambridge, some in London, a tad in Melbourn, and a very important chunk in Italy. Is next year the year I land an agent and send it out? Maybe. Thanks for asking.
Ann, this is both delightful and surprising. Who knew that Cambridge insisted for so long on treating its faculty like monks? When my mother was coming to terms with her exile from academia, the obstacle was not just her gender but her status as a faculty wife. I assumed that long tradition let men have it easy.
Thanks Rona, exactly so - they were like monks (or the university thought of them that way). I'd like to read more about your mother's frustration with her status as faculty wife, rather than academic in her own right. I guess the obscure rituals must have felt weird to men too, but they felt they had to stick to tradition (in their best interest).
Oh, that would be great, Etta! I’m planning to write more about Caroline Jebb in the future. If your friend has any interest in the Reynolds/Evans family I have lots of information.
I love the Victorian novels. All of them, but most of all Wuthering Heights, Jane Brontë, and Middlemarch. Thank you for continuing the tradition. I would like to write in this vein.
Many thanks for your lovely comment, Jennifer. I love Victorian novels too and feel honoured to have the chance to teach and write about them - look forward to reading more of your own writing, and thanks for following.
I remember - I think from The Forsyte Saga. Siamese and Irene? I'm on a train and can't check - that brides wore their wedding dress at dinner parties in the first year of married life. A way of marking their new status, and getting some wear out of the dress.
Hello - further to this, I seem to recall that in Nancy M's Love in a Cold Climate the narrator, Fanny, marries an Oxford don, and is told after her first dinner party that she had disappointed her guests by not wearing her wedding dress. Which always struck me as amazing and perhaps an Oxford quirk.
Aha, that's an excellent tip, Val - and I can see you mean Soames not Siamese! Of course, it must have made sense to get the wear out of the dress. One of the women I'm researching wore a plain dress to her wedding 'so as not to look like a bride' and even she had to go through with the dinner several years after she married. I'll be writing more about this in due course, so the Forsyte saga is a great reference to have.
Such a great piece, Ann! This Cambridge ritual was new to me and I love the juxtaposition of the contemporary and Victorian wedding photos. It fits with the Plath-Hughes story too, where they (or just she?) put on their wedding outfits for the photos months later. How interesting!
Oh that's a good connection, Victoria, I hadn't thought of that. Wedding photos seem to have been much on my mind in June! Thanks for your lovely comment.
What an odd custom; as if the wife were marrying Cambridge University itself. I am unaware of any such custom at an American university. Quite the opposite; the wives of faculty were rarely welcomed into campus culture in my own experiences as student and a faculty member.
Thank you Jill. I think the fanfare given to a Cambridge bride was for one night only! Just like wives of faculty, after one or two special events the Victorian wives were expected to stay in the background. I’m researching the married women at Cambridge who organized their own intellectual clubs.
I remember reading Monica Dickens' autobiography and the same ritual was expected of US naval officers' wives in the mid-twentieth century. She married a US naval officer and had some very sharp-eyed things to say about it all...
Oh, I did enjoy this! And it fills in some background for me - I'd never thought about "Aunt Cara" from Period Piece being a new bride, but in that book Gwen Raverat has some excellent stories. She also talks about wedding traditions - in the context of Aunt Cara's niece, her own American mother Maud, marrying into Cambridge. Even in the post-Fellows-allowed-to-marry era, many of the traditions carried on, including that special version of the wider tradition that women left the table before the port arrived. More than one such bride, probably the youngest lady in the room and certainly paralysed by social terror, just couldn't get up the nerve, says Gwen, and eventually some older lady had to rise and propel the poor girl into giving the cue.
Thank you Emma for your lovely comment. I did enjoy finding out more about Caroline (as you will know, Richard renamed her Cara on their honeymoon - he disliked the informality of 'Carrie' as she was known to her American family). Gwen's satirical take in Period Piece on all those rather pompous Cambridge rituals is brilliant, & I love her drawing of the ladies and gentlemen going in to dine. Amazing that the traditions continued for so long!
Plus, I'm amused to remember that - Cambridge being Cambridge - Florence Keynes's son Geoffrey married Margaret Darwin, Gwen Raverat's sister.
Caroline Jebb was a famous beauty. Apparently someone said, "Is it true that you were once received four proposals of marriage in this very room?" and she said, "Oh, no. One of them was in the garden."
The families were so interconnected! The young Virginia Woolf said, while staying with her aunt in Cambridge: 'Lord! How dull it would be to live here! There seem to be about 10 nice and interesting people, who circulate in each other’s houses – Darwins, Maitlands, Newnham, etc.’ I love that quote of Caroline's too - she was incredibly droll.
Thank you for this fascinating post! I know I've read in nineteenth century novels gentry families honouring the new bride with a dinner. Often it was her welcome into a new community too. This sounds a particularly terrifying version!
Many thanks, and that's great you've heard of other versions of this tradition in 19th c novels - if you can think of a reference I'd love to have it. So far I have the Forsyte saga (looking back at that era) and Love in a Cold Climate. Yes I presume it was meant to be welcoming, and also a wish to impress!
But I'm most reminded of And Ladies of the Club - American small town Ohio in the nineteenth century! There is a plot line where the leading lady of the town does not want to entertain for a rather declassee new bride, but her husband says she must, it's the done thing. Formal invitations go out, "To honour Mrs Douglas Gardiner ...", local dignitaries are invited, and the bride is judged to have passed the test because she can choose the right fork amongst a forest of cutlery.
It's written in the twentieth century but immaculately researched so far as I can tell.
Oh and there's also the point that the couple could be honoured with a dinner while engaged, but then etiquette means that the bride's disapproved of parents have to be invited. Once she's a married woman, that no longer applies.
Thank you Vicky! I seem a bit wedding-obsessed recently, but I guess one wedding leads to another as the old saying goes. Planning to move onto WW1 and mention 'Different Drums' in a special 'best of' recent history books post soon.
Loved the “Caroline, who was from Philadelphia, was amused rather than intimidated by the whole affair,…” — nice to get that perspective from the start!
The photo is quite odd, isn't it? I took it that she was reading the book that he was holding…
I agree, the photo is quite intriguing - a mix of the pose ordered by the photographer, no doubt, and the expressions of both of them. Of course, it makes sense that she's reading from his book, but both of them look unconvinced by that charade! I love Caroline Jebb's acerbic take on the whole Cambridge business, her letters are brilliant.
“The dress takes up more room than her husband does” is quite the statement! And the idea of showing up months or years later in your wedding dress clearly doesn’t take into consideration the changes women’s bodies go through. I think the tradition of “reaffirming one’s vows” at the 25-year mark is somewhat similar. Women are expected to fit into their original gowns; it is a point of pride.
I love these two photos, the Baker Street one in particular. I love the idea of reading whatever story you imagine into it. Thank you, Ann, for this lovely article.
As I've mentioned, Cambridge features in my novel. I always hold my breath when I read your posts, hoping I got the research enough correct. So far, so good. Thanks as always. Also bewitching photograph that is an excellent writing prompt.
Thank you Marjorie! Glad we both have done our research (always good to get tips too). What is your novel's title? I agree with you about the Victorian wedding photo as a good prompt!
You are much more informed than myself. I love reading your insights. The title is still in play; I have three and waffle constantly. Im still editing the novel (aka slashing.) I write long. Anyway, its an adult, literary fiction, family saga, with historical fiction elements. Four POVs, and one of those is the primary character, Howard. In the early 1980s, Howard is forced into an early retirement from his London law firm and embarks on a passion project. The result changes the his life and the lives of all the people most dear to him. Most of the story takes place in Norfolk around Dereham, an important chunk in Cambridge, some in London, a tad in Melbourn, and a very important chunk in Italy. Is next year the year I land an agent and send it out? Maybe. Thanks for asking.
Ann, this is both delightful and surprising. Who knew that Cambridge insisted for so long on treating its faculty like monks? When my mother was coming to terms with her exile from academia, the obstacle was not just her gender but her status as a faculty wife. I assumed that long tradition let men have it easy.
Thanks Rona, exactly so - they were like monks (or the university thought of them that way). I'd like to read more about your mother's frustration with her status as faculty wife, rather than academic in her own right. I guess the obscure rituals must have felt weird to men too, but they felt they had to stick to tradition (in their best interest).
Fascinating!!! I will share with a friend who is a research librarian from Philadelphia. I think she may be interested in Jebb, at least!
Oh, that would be great, Etta! I’m planning to write more about Caroline Jebb in the future. If your friend has any interest in the Reynolds/Evans family I have lots of information.
She has already responded that she knew nothing about her but is going to get the letter collection and read it.
That's super. It's a lovely book.
I love the Victorian novels. All of them, but most of all Wuthering Heights, Jane Brontë, and Middlemarch. Thank you for continuing the tradition. I would like to write in this vein.
Many thanks for your lovely comment, Jennifer. I love Victorian novels too and feel honoured to have the chance to teach and write about them - look forward to reading more of your own writing, and thanks for following.
I remember - I think from The Forsyte Saga. Siamese and Irene? I'm on a train and can't check - that brides wore their wedding dress at dinner parties in the first year of married life. A way of marking their new status, and getting some wear out of the dress.
Hello - further to this, I seem to recall that in Nancy M's Love in a Cold Climate the narrator, Fanny, marries an Oxford don, and is told after her first dinner party that she had disappointed her guests by not wearing her wedding dress. Which always struck me as amazing and perhaps an Oxford quirk.
Not so it seems.... Fascinating, all of it!
Oh that’s wonderful Laura, I felt sure Oxford must do something similar, and here’s the proof (well into the 20th c too).
Oh wretched spellcheck. Soames, not Siamese.
Aha, that's an excellent tip, Val - and I can see you mean Soames not Siamese! Of course, it must have made sense to get the wear out of the dress. One of the women I'm researching wore a plain dress to her wedding 'so as not to look like a bride' and even she had to go through with the dinner several years after she married. I'll be writing more about this in due course, so the Forsyte saga is a great reference to have.
I hope I'm right!
I'm sure you are and will enjoy checking it out, regardless.
Signed up already.
Such a great piece, Ann! This Cambridge ritual was new to me and I love the juxtaposition of the contemporary and Victorian wedding photos. It fits with the Plath-Hughes story too, where they (or just she?) put on their wedding outfits for the photos months later. How interesting!
Oh that's a good connection, Victoria, I hadn't thought of that. Wedding photos seem to have been much on my mind in June! Thanks for your lovely comment.
What an odd custom; as if the wife were marrying Cambridge University itself. I am unaware of any such custom at an American university. Quite the opposite; the wives of faculty were rarely welcomed into campus culture in my own experiences as student and a faculty member.
Thank you Jill. I think the fanfare given to a Cambridge bride was for one night only! Just like wives of faculty, after one or two special events the Victorian wives were expected to stay in the background. I’m researching the married women at Cambridge who organized their own intellectual clubs.
I remember reading Monica Dickens' autobiography and the same ritual was expected of US naval officers' wives in the mid-twentieth century. She married a US naval officer and had some very sharp-eyed things to say about it all...
Ah, thanks Susanna, I must look out for that. I love Monica Dickens's writing.
Oh, I did enjoy this! And it fills in some background for me - I'd never thought about "Aunt Cara" from Period Piece being a new bride, but in that book Gwen Raverat has some excellent stories. She also talks about wedding traditions - in the context of Aunt Cara's niece, her own American mother Maud, marrying into Cambridge. Even in the post-Fellows-allowed-to-marry era, many of the traditions carried on, including that special version of the wider tradition that women left the table before the port arrived. More than one such bride, probably the youngest lady in the room and certainly paralysed by social terror, just couldn't get up the nerve, says Gwen, and eventually some older lady had to rise and propel the poor girl into giving the cue.
Thank you Emma for your lovely comment. I did enjoy finding out more about Caroline (as you will know, Richard renamed her Cara on their honeymoon - he disliked the informality of 'Carrie' as she was known to her American family). Gwen's satirical take in Period Piece on all those rather pompous Cambridge rituals is brilliant, & I love her drawing of the ladies and gentlemen going in to dine. Amazing that the traditions continued for so long!
Plus, I'm amused to remember that - Cambridge being Cambridge - Florence Keynes's son Geoffrey married Margaret Darwin, Gwen Raverat's sister.
Caroline Jebb was a famous beauty. Apparently someone said, "Is it true that you were once received four proposals of marriage in this very room?" and she said, "Oh, no. One of them was in the garden."
The families were so interconnected! The young Virginia Woolf said, while staying with her aunt in Cambridge: 'Lord! How dull it would be to live here! There seem to be about 10 nice and interesting people, who circulate in each other’s houses – Darwins, Maitlands, Newnham, etc.’ I love that quote of Caroline's too - she was incredibly droll.
I have not heard of this tradition, I am intrigued! Oh society… 🤣
Thanks Jen! It is quite peculiar, isn't it?
Thank you for this fascinating post! I know I've read in nineteenth century novels gentry families honouring the new bride with a dinner. Often it was her welcome into a new community too. This sounds a particularly terrifying version!
Many thanks, and that's great you've heard of other versions of this tradition in 19th c novels - if you can think of a reference I'd love to have it. So far I have the Forsyte saga (looking back at that era) and Love in a Cold Climate. Yes I presume it was meant to be welcoming, and also a wish to impress!
Isn't Emma forced to "entertain" for Mrs Elton?
But I'm most reminded of And Ladies of the Club - American small town Ohio in the nineteenth century! There is a plot line where the leading lady of the town does not want to entertain for a rather declassee new bride, but her husband says she must, it's the done thing. Formal invitations go out, "To honour Mrs Douglas Gardiner ...", local dignitaries are invited, and the bride is judged to have passed the test because she can choose the right fork amongst a forest of cutlery.
It's written in the twentieth century but immaculately researched so far as I can tell.
Oh and there's also the point that the couple could be honoured with a dinner while engaged, but then etiquette means that the bride's disapproved of parents have to be invited. Once she's a married woman, that no longer applies.
Just loved the photo at Baker St station, and the story of Cambridge brides.
Thanks so much
Vicky
Thank you Vicky! I seem a bit wedding-obsessed recently, but I guess one wedding leads to another as the old saying goes. Planning to move onto WW1 and mention 'Different Drums' in a special 'best of' recent history books post soon.
Thank you — fascinating, and mildly horrifying.
Loved the “Caroline, who was from Philadelphia, was amused rather than intimidated by the whole affair,…” — nice to get that perspective from the start!
The photo is quite odd, isn't it? I took it that she was reading the book that he was holding…
I agree, the photo is quite intriguing - a mix of the pose ordered by the photographer, no doubt, and the expressions of both of them. Of course, it makes sense that she's reading from his book, but both of them look unconvinced by that charade! I love Caroline Jebb's acerbic take on the whole Cambridge business, her letters are brilliant.
Love hearing about her, along with the others. What a great world.
Fascinating, the way Cambridge always did things the Cambridge way. Ritual and substance merging, hard to tell which is which...
Thanks Maria! So much of Oxbridge was about tradition, wasn't it - and still is, in many ways.
It is indeed, Cambridge a little lighter of touch than Oxford!
“The dress takes up more room than her husband does” is quite the statement! And the idea of showing up months or years later in your wedding dress clearly doesn’t take into consideration the changes women’s bodies go through. I think the tradition of “reaffirming one’s vows” at the 25-year mark is somewhat similar. Women are expected to fit into their original gowns; it is a point of pride.
I love these two photos, the Baker Street one in particular. I love the idea of reading whatever story you imagine into it. Thank you, Ann, for this lovely article.